Planet of the Grapes

40 Lincoln Center Plaza (located west of Broadway and Columbus Avenue from W. 62nd to W. 65th Street) Having visited the grand performance halls of Lincoln Center and evaluated their loos, we decided to check in with the library that shares its home with these great stages, stages where we will inevitably present readings of [...]

2245 Broadway (at 80th Street) Zabar’s bills itself as “New York’s Epicurean Emporium.” Taking the “epicurean” term in its broader sense, we showed up in togas expecting an orgy, but were stared down by seventy year old women fighting over nova lox, promptly dashing such hopes. However, upon finding that the word primarily implies indulging [...]

2289 Broadway at the corner of 82nd Street In reviewing the varying Barnes and Nobles of New York City, we are beginning to feel like a writer who is paid well by a publisher and spurned on by a rabid but intellectually challenged fan base to keep writing the same crappy book. Sure, there may [...]

61st Street & Broadway The Biblical Museum can be found virtually around the corner from Lincoln Center and provides you with exactly a room-and-a-half of some drawings by marginally significant Renaissance era artists. In fact, there’s more to do in the gift shop on the ground floor than paying to get into the museum proper. [...]

Central Park West at 79th Street Carl Sagan was quoted as saying that the universe is made up of “billions and billions of stars.” Had he seen the bathrooms in the Hayden Planetarium, he may have referred to them as having “billions and billions of germs.” The floors and walls are almost evenly coated with [...]

71st Street and Broadway Stepping into this bathroom reminds us of stepping into Van Gogh’s mind, at least while he was painting landscapes during the day. No, this is not an absinthe hallucination, but rather a very abstract and dare we say clever way of saying that yellow is a predominant color in this bathroom [...]

81st Street & Central Park West The American Museum of Natural History (cue Intelligent Design joke) knows how to wow. It greets its front-door visitors with a gigantic Tyrannosaurus Rex skeleton (or as creationists call it, “Untitled Bone Sculpture”). The visitors then embark on a journey of plexi-glass and fossils, taking them back through time [...]

between West 62nd and 65th Streets and Columbus and Amsterdam Avenues If Dante had drank a little too much wine before entering the Inferno, he probably would have found himself confusedly stumbling through the basement of the Met Opera House, looking for the public restroom. Indeed, we ran into a homeless wino claiming to be [...]

between West 62nd and 65th Streets and Columbus and Amsterdam Avenues Across the street from the Upper West Side location of the entry above sits ”the real deal,” nest of the culture vultures, Lincoln Center. Since the purpose of our investigations has always been to serve the interests of ”quick relief” while spending the day [...]

1972 Broadway, corner of 66th Street Being that Barnes and Noble is a haven for knowledge and learning, a place one can go to to edify oneself through the written word (regardless of purchase, thankfully, as their attempt to perpetuate a ”lax vibe” results in many using it as a reading room), you may expect [...]